👆Can You Smoke Green Tea

hiya toots sweet nippies welcome to the
chain before I get started I have a
little message for my boys down at the
DEA hi boys just want to say y'all
better get your fucking notepads ready
because I'm about to uncover the next
Schedule one drug
I mean also before we get started just
want to disclaim I'm not a crackhead all
right I just carry crackhead tendencies
that's all like how a crackhead would
sell their body for crack cocaine that's
similar to how I would sell my body for
like a nice cup of green tea I don't
think you're getting this so I mean I'll
give you another example a crackhead
could teach you how to smoke crack
similar to how I'm gonna teach you how
to smoke green tea hear me Oh Bill Nye
walked so I could run and I am sprinting
bitch I'm doing this for science I'm
doing this for the eighth graders who've
been smoking oregano for the past six
months I'm doing this for America so
kindly hop off my dick alright now that
we're somewhere discreet and no one's
gonna call the cops on me for suspicious
activity that's gonna do it as hard as
it may be to believe me at this point so
I don't have the proper equipment for
like you know but as I said before
crackhead tendencies are my genetic
makeup so I will jump through any hoop I
will overcome any obstacle to smoke this
green tea so here the tools we're going
to be using for today's DIY I'm just as
scared for my life as you are also just
realize this says high octane tea like I
don't know what that means
but I've definitely heard the phrase
high octane gasoline before so I'm sure
it's fine
it says no GMOs what I should really be
worried about is inhaling this red 40
die into my lungs it says it's vegan now
so I'm sure it's fine we're gonna split
this we're gonna roll this now to just
pull this funnel right out of my ass
sticky you seeing that this is T all
right marks be long now we can pack her
down a little bit and then twist her up
a little pink guy tell me that wouldn't
disappoint every one of your granny's at
home come on look at that little pink
joint what do I call a cigarette what do
I call this a point Pete peener wiener
toxic waste : a t ah blow that's fucking
sick I like that is this what it feels
like to film of a pop box before I
partake in this morally questionable act
allow me to get biblical
hi I'm youth pastor grace nowhere in the
bible does it say abstain from smoking
green tea okay nowhere so don't think by
me doing this I'm straying from God's
light all right if anything this is
gonna bring me closer to God if anything
this could bring me to God's gates I
might literally die but if both God and
Bill Nighy would approve the clouds were
getting these are some high caliber
cloud I might just have to do
poking montage you like jazz
final backseat thoughts green tea burns
like it's not illegal but maybe it
should be I'm not higher anything
obviously but I do feel caffeinated not
gonna lie
sorry if you were Mormon and looking for
a loophole this isn't it
you can try camomile though for all my
middle schoolers who were following
along don't try this at home or at least
just don't do in a car because fun facts
when you burn blotting paper it smells
like burnt blotting paper my car smells
like a broken law right now to the point
where I'm gonna be pissed if I don't get
grounded like I hope I get caught I
deserve to get caught but I still want
to get rid of evidence because I would
much rather have my parents think that
I'm smoking weed to know that I smoked a
green tea if you thought I was about to
throw this out of the window you've got
me messed up boy I may not always be
morally aware but I will always be
environmentally aware no we're gonna do
this the right way put it in a bag and
throw it in our neighbor's trash can
noise BP high octane butane I'm smoking
a whole last gas station